You'd think, after all this, that I wouldn't be shocked anymore. But HOLY SHIT. This thing made me laugh so hard that not only did I pee all overmyself, I gave myself a hernia too. Jesus H christ.

None of this thing makes any god damn sense AT ALL.

Ok, so there's a trackball. And it's centered. Good. After that, I don't understand a single fucking thing about this.

Look at the joystick bolts. Closely. They're not straight! What the hell? I guess the builder of this fine thing must have such a strong fear of being close to people that he'd rather stand on the corner of the cabinet where the control panel can jab him in the nuts, than in front of it.

Then there are the buttons. Not a single one of which make any sense to me at all. Ok, so maybe the 2 powder blue ones near the top are player 1 and 2 start, maybe. But after that? WTF? There are buttons all around the joysticks, and even mashed up against the spinner. I can't fucking believe anyone did this on purpose.

Is there some sort of malady that's like dyslexia; but for spacial logic? Does this guy look at his CP and see things in regular order? FOR GOD SAKE, SOMEONE EXPLAIN THIS TO ME!

I think I need therapy now. Some things you can't un-see.